We really are just good friends after all:)

Greetings my fair bloggers!

Time has passed me by and i feel as though i've been hit by a bus and reversed over numerous times! But i'm loving life and managing to keep my upper lids from closing, before i dwell into an unconscious state of sleep!

I'm going o firstly elaborate a little bit further on my weekend.
As i mentioned in my previous post, we graced the drivers of the A1 grand Prix with our presence and support, sold burgers until we were dripping with the very sweat secreted by the glands of our skin and answered questions on camera until our cheeks were burning with shame! Man i think we brought Spur's name down:)

The evenings concluded the day with a dinner at Butcher's Block on Saterday night and sundowners on the deck of Joe kools on Sunday evening.
After escaping and dodging the Durban traffic at approximately 6:00pm we headed back to Roxy's house.
I then rounded off the evening with a dinner at Butcher's Block with the presence of my extended family. I approach the doors of Butcher's Block with slops, a skirt, sunglasses and all-not elegant at all! To my amusement, many of the family members commented on my basted tan. I however believe otherwise and question whether or not the glow of my skin was really a tan or merely a mask of dirt, from the races. A good day's appetite was well sufficed by a tender chicken breast smothered in a Cambembert and bacon sauce, complemented by a side dish of veg. The dinner was flushed down with my new favourite- Savannah Lite with a slice of lemon.
Lazy Lizzard was to be our next destination after the dinner (Roxy had attended a 21st and plans were to meet at Lazy's afterwards)
Slight alterations to the plan- we headed on home instead as our bodies were not coping with our mental capacity at this time of the evening!

Sunday evening, as mentioned before was spent on the deck of Joe Kools with a Cosmopolitan in one hand as the waves crashed against the piers of Durbans beach front.
The evening was beautiful and the air was fresh.
Two friends met up with Roxy and myself at Joe Kools- Anton and his friend Bryan.
The evening was spent just chilling at Joe's and ended off with a couple of dances on the dance floor of Joe kools. The crowd was good and the vibe was awesome!
Thank goodness Joe's is casual on a Sunday evening as i couldn't bear to wear heels after the long hours of standing!

We didn't end up leaving too late, knowing we had been up since like 6:00 and hadn't been home since. Varsity ended up being a little more than interesting on Monday morning, with the amounts of vitamins and tonics i swigged down.

So you thinking.... What's news right? Been waiting all this time to find out what this blog is all about? Here we go:

Remember my 'potentially-hot-friend' ? Well, we kinda ended up chatting about everything.
It had been a while since we had heard from each other via sms or whatever it may be.
We discussed where we sorta stand with each other and the conclsion is that we both decided we're gonna just be really good friends. i'm really stoked about this, as i never intended for anything more whatsoever. Ok ya, so i had a little bit of doubts and questions where our friendship was going etc but it's cool it's all cleared up now.

What makes the situation amusing though is that HE thought i had intentions for something more. That's how it came up. So obviously i'm like 'hang on buddy'. (I didn't say that but it was going through my head).
I nearly drove off the road when he replied to my first sms telling me how he's not up for a relationship at the moment but he thinks i'm an amazin and beautiful girl.
I'm like, who said anything about a relationship? Anyway.. we were both very honest witheach other and i told him i'm really not up for a relationship and that i'm happy we both feel the same way. I also apologized for making him think i had other intentions than just being a friend:) Haha.. so now we just really good friends (as we always were though). He's such a player though:) You don't even want to read some of the smses we send to each other:)
Well, we still do that and we still comfortable with each other, but now we know that it's othing more than friends:)
Typical rugby player.... goes straight to the head... or shall i say.... typical MALE:)
Remember i kept on writing in my previous posts of how i was concerned he may get the wrong impression?!?
Anyway, we probably gonna do coffee soon, which will be better than the usual 'club' environment, where we can't hear four words from each other.

My ex? Well, he still keeps initiating the smses and out of courtesy i respond, cause i'm not playing any games or anything and at least he still puts in the effort hey.
At the moment i'm enjoying life and love being single!

Anyway, today was a long day of varsity, as i had speech clinic- my 5year old client. He's really adorable! Finishing at five, i was told to get ready as dinner was going to be at John Dory's tonight. I wasn't really hungry and i'm on a whole new fitness plan. This therefore encouraged me to stick to a John House Salad-Awesome.

At the moment, my car is in for an overall service, which is often frustrating in times of need! To my surprise my dad bought me sound for my car which is to be installed tomorrow morning. I'm picking it up tomorrow after varsity.

Anyway.. think that's gonna be it for now. Spoken way too much!
May edit another post a little later if i have the time!
Otherwise fairwell my bloggers*
Mwah*

Blood, sweat and tears...

The buzzing of the alarm clock, placed strategically next to my bed becomes my early morning headache, whilst my duvet suffocates me as i roll out of bed at 5:30am on Saterday morning.
The day was a scorcher and the sun sucked every water particle form my body as we departed my house.

Roxy and myself, after arring at the A1-Grand Prix, were escorted to the tents at which we had to proceed with our 'promotions'. So much for promoting! The two of us ended up behind the 'cash desk', consisting of one calculator and one Lacoste box for the float. All was good on Saterday and we managed pretty well. Sunday however hit us like a dog on heat!!
The tent was a mad house! Only having three grillers and three girls managing the cash, we were spinning! The crowds just kept on coming! Murphy's law, during the rush of it all, they had to close us down because our trading license had an error or something so minor as that.
Half the customers had to be redirected to 'Moodley's Breyani' because Spur was officially closed.

What made the weekend most enjoyable was engaging with the other spectators as well as a cameraman and his little sidekick. Roxy and i were soaking in the morning's sun on the grass, as we had a full view of the cars passing. We were then approached by these two Smurfs running around the grassy lawn, catching as much of a crowd as possible. We were initially asked by them if we were willing to be interviewed so obviously we agreed.
The Interview consisted of the following questions and anwswers:

Interviewer: So how are you feeling about today
Us: Oh it's an absolutely amazing day and we wouldn't want to be anywhere else right now..
yak yak yak...It's going to be really exciting...yak yak yak...

Interviewer: So you guys watch the Grand Prix often or support the Grand Prix?
Us: Aaaahh.... ya we really dig the whole atmosphere of it and checkin out the cars etc...yak yak

Interviewer: So which team do you support?
Us: (pause)...(look at each other)...(pause)...
Roxy: I don't know, Claire which team do you support:)
Claire..(pause)...(pause)
Roxy: The Porcsh!!!

.....How blind...... wait for it.......

Interviewer: Ok... and how do you think South Africa will do?
Us: (pause)...ummmmm.....(sweating)...
Roxy: Hopefully first, second or third!!!!

.....ya ok don't say anything!......

Don't know whether that one's going on t.v;)

Anyway... I think i'm gonna continue this post tomorow and let you in on a little more. I've only covered like 1/4 of my weekend so hang tight, sleep tight and see ya tomorrow.

Mwah*

A little bit of Scaramouch...

Hey guys!

Just got back home from work now. Posted a blog a little earlier before work.
Work was ok. Little bit of a waste of time, but what the hell... i get paid for it:)
tonight was a little different though as my friend, Teri only has her learners but she's driving around everywhere with her car.

A little bit on the safe side, she wanted me to drive the car to the petrol station and fill up her car, as she feared she would take out the petrol pumps, the wall or any other surrounding car. At least somebody trusts my driving! So after arriving there, the 'quick' stop took a little longert than expected. She wanted me to pumpo up the right froint tyre, as it was looking really flat. Turns out it was a puncture.

Never fear though.. The spanner becomes useful at this time. Or does it? We flip up the boot and hook the spanner onto the bolts. Or at least attempt to. I hadn't known this but apparently you get these special 'locked-in' bolts to prevent one stealing your tyres?? Huh? Why?
Anyway... cause it was her brothers car, it took us some time to figure this out.
Luckily we had the 'key' to unlock these fancy bolts or however it works! (Sarcasm)- no we didn't have the key!! Moving along, eventually they organised that foam that you put in the tyres and i think that worked in the meantime?

Well... after work i went to Scaramouch. After ordering my new delight Savannah with a slice of lemon and a straw (i know you laugh, but i prefer drinking out of a straw. It doesn't look too appealing having a girl swig out of the bottle i think. Some can pull it off but others it's a no no)
Anyway, we ended up chatting to two guys, the one is currently my friends boyfriend (don't think anything- i respect my friends) and the other one being his friend. Now his friend, i've seen pretty much everywhere! Being it work, rugby, 80's, 54.. hes there. So he kinda gave me a friendly smile and greeting and by the end of the evening we were chatting away. Turns out, he's a really great guy and a rugby player... Aaarghh... think i should stay away from the rugby players for a while:) time goes so quickly though and before i knew it, it was time to head home(considering i have varsity tomorrow:()
Funny how i've seen him like evrywhere and now cause i've met him, he'l probably fall off the face of the earth!

Anyway.. thats just a little update for now! Gotta sleep now and my computer is gettin slower and slower as we speak!
Sweet dreams*

The beats of my heart...

As i climb into the car and turn on the ignition, i slip my cd into the player and drift into another world...

Ever realised how many thoughts skip through your mind either on the way to or from work or varsity. Or for that fact, if you go anywhere? It's like you enter another world where everything becomes a little more than perfect. Your eyes start sketching the scenery as you gaze passed the glistening car windows, as the sun's warmth envelops your and the beams of sunshine glisten, as it reflects off the car's interior. Your cheeks are brushed with the scent of the fresh morning's breeze, as your arms reflect the golden colour of the sun's glow. You take a deep breath and inhale the freshly scent of a new day...

The dancing tunes and the crisp voices form a new melody inside my head. The meoldy takes me by the hand and guides me into a presence of peace and sanity...

As i mellow and sink into the voices of the lecturers and the spinning thoughts in my head, i recite the songs in my head, over and over again.
After every lecture, i'm able to take out my mp3 player and switch off-back into that mode that had welcomed me into a new day. As i scan the room, i begin to notice the people and the environment in which i sit. Everything is then seen in a different light. I then become oblivious to my environment and allow the words of every songs to sink into my heart, as the songs dance around in my head.

My life is seen as a movie before me. The words and stories of each song become so real to my life and i find myself matching my experiences to every song, like a puzzle.
Ocassionally, i'd find a song slipping beyond my thoughts and enter my heart, where it becomes so deeply moulded into my heart- a melody of my life.

As i get nudged on the arm, i slowly lift my head and hop off the cloud i found myself floating on. Lectures begin yet again...

As the day starts to wrap itself up, music becomes my best friend once again as i slip into the world of my own thoughts and the melodys they reveal. The trip home, almost seems much better.

Ever realise how much you think when you're in the car or when you're listening to music?
You may step into your car with the world on your shoulders, yet we tend to leave pieces of our problems along the way home.

My music then becomes my bednight kiss as i roll over and close my eyes. Once again, my eyes become weary and hypnotised with every song, as my heart beat slows down to nothing but a beat to the music*

Picking up the crumbs...

Hey all!

It's stinking hot and slowly but surely i'm peeling the gel off my nails one by one, watching the French pieces flake before me. Isn't this suppose to be an indication of nerves or summin? Well, i don't think i am.

I got a lot on my mind though and sometimes i really despise the fact that girls carry too many emotions. More so than guys? Ok so that's a stereotypical statement to make. I know guys can be emotional too i guess. Even when it comes to relationships. Somehow they seem to handle it better though right? Girls tend to carry it over their heads for way too long!

Girls become exceptionally sentimental, particularly in a relationship. They want to keep the photos, the letters, and anything possible that will remind them of where they've been and who they've known. Take note the next time you enter a girls room again.
Girls collect the crumbs they leave behind as they walk along the path of life. Guys however leave them behind, knowing well that the crumbs are there for a reason and are meant to stay. Little do we know, what an effect these memories have on us later in life. We tend to look back at previous events or stages in our life and sometimes experience a feeling of contentment, so much that you may even want to go back. Or every so often, as we stumble across these memories, we cannot help but fight back the lump in our throats.
How do we overcome these feelings? Or do we? It's obviously innate in every person to come to some form of realisation, where they have been in comparison to where they are now.

Sometimes i wonder what it would be like to go back. Back to those memories we now cherish.
What would we have changed? How would we have changed the situation or altered it to how we feel today? As much as it sounds as though i'm wishing my life away, i'm not. I'm justtrying to think of how maybe things would have been today if i had made alternative decisions, met different people or reacted differently in a situation. Sometimes i think i've screwed up totally with various parts in my life. Things i should or shouldnt have said. Things i should or shouldn't have done. And people i should have kept closer to heart than those who were merely known as 'friends'.

Out of all honesty, yes there are some things i would have changed, but maybe not all of it. Like they say, if it doesn't kill you, it only makes you stronger right?

I can see it now. When situations and reasonings to life seemed so transparent and opaque back then and appeared distant before my eyes, has become more distinct and fine now. Only now do i realise what sort of story life tells and and what picture it paints. However, it only comes visible to me as a blur. As life carries on, the picture becomes more define.

Anyway, it's just a thought.
I stumbled across these lyrics from the band The Fray. Many of you may have only become familiar of them now. The lyrics are touching and often it reminds me of a friend of mine. As i say, sometimes i wish i could go back in time and alter the situation a bit.
Just enough to make things a little better than what they are today.

If you ever get the time, listen to the song.

How To Save A Life The Fray lyrics
Artist: The Fray
Album: How To Save A Life

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through

Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along

And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life How to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Who am i???

Ha ha... Thought this was perfect for my post:)

Just been doing some pondering over the weekend and considering i'm still highly drugged up on medication from being sick over the previous week, i spent the lectures of today half dozing off and having constant intervals of self analysis. I also mentioned in my previous post that i had a lot on my mind. I'm not going to share with you all my thoughts and concerns at the moment, as some of them have become really cumbersome for me to get my head around and i really am struggling to overcome these concerns. However, i do know that sooner or later......

I'l get over it:)

Well, having spent a fair amount of evenings out in Durban being it 80's, Joe's or 54, it has enabled me to draw some conclusions to a number of questions of mine.

Firstly, i have mentioned to you that i have no intentions whatsoever to go out just for the sake of 'being' with someone or hooking up. I think a lot of my friends thought of me otherwise.

It's not that i have anything against it or anything but i'm just not that type of girl i guess.

And i guess i've known it from the start. I just find that personally i couldn't hook up with someone i barely know. Then again, i shouldn't talk too soon, i did kind of hook up with my ex last new years and i didn't really know him then i guess....oops.

I don't know, maybe i speak too soon but i don't think i'm that sort of person?

I think i'm a one-guy at a time sort of girl. I'm sure by reading my posts and knowing me, a lot of you may realise this about me. When i like a guy, i really like a guy. On that note i'm REALLY fussy with guys. So lets just say i meet a guy. If there is some form of attraction, i'l be able to get over the guy pretty easily and move on. However, if i've liked a guy for a while and let's just say i really like him, it'll take me a while to get over it. But that's only in situations, where i know the guy is pretty keen as well. I'm not gonna sit and dwell on a guy if he doesn't like me. Straight forward, i'l move on. But things like ex's and 'possibles' are such a downfall for me hey. However i think i've grown a lot stronger since my previous break up and i think i can handle it better now. And i think i'm babbling and contradicting myself heavily in this paragraph so i'm just gonna move on...:) Basically what i'm trying to say is, i can't be with one guy the one night and another guy the other night. Get the point?

On that note... why is it that when somebody tends to go out a lot or head off for a good night in Durban, a lot of people classify them as being 'dodge' or 'gone off the rails'? What is that? I think it occurs a lot in the context of the church. I'm sure a lot of my friends see me as being 'dodge' now. Especially those i sat religiously in church with. Don't worry guys, i'm still the same person inside and out. Many people tend to generalize or stereotype when it comes to going out, drinking or whatever it may be. I'm sure a lot of you know what i mean and probably experienced the same judgements.

I just want to say that i still feel the same, i still have the same emotions and fears and i still share a one on one, day to day relationship with God. Just like anybody, i still have my concerns and possible doubts here and there but i'm still the same person you once knew or once met.

I'm sorry if i've made my relationship with God seem 'wish-washed', but i'm using it merely as an example in this blog, rather than the basis of this post. I think in time, i will post a new post on my spiritual basis with God and the possible questions which arise within myself.

Point is, don't judge me because of my choices in this particular area of my life. Please don't classify me as another servant of God gone 'dodge'. I still carry the same morals and beliefs and even though my decisons and motives may have changed here and there, i'm still me:)

So thanks to all those friends of mine that still see the same person they knew when we first met and all those who may have forgiven or excused any unjustifiable things i may have done to alter your views of me.

Anyway.. i'm sorry for all the babble. I think this medication is still in the bloodstream!

Thanks for hearing me out! I would alsolove to hear what you guys have to say!

I'm off to sleep now! Got another long day ahead of me tomorrow with speech clinic....

Sweet dreams*

So much to do, such little time...

Okay, so you gotta give me a little bit of a break regarding my blog!
Weekends...expect a little delay:)

Well, it all began friday. Woke up a little later than the usual 6:00, took a morning shower and departed for a couple hours worth lectures. What was suppose to be from like 12:00 to 2:00 ended up being only an hour or so lecture which wasn't to my objection at all obviously.
Lauren and i decided to end the week off with a creamy cup of cuppacino provided by the very well known Kloof coffee shop, Sprigs. The aroma of their Bran muffins eventually swayed us into sharing one between the two of us. Anyway, i think i mentioned this in my previous blog? Not sure but we wont dwell on thaat for too long.

Friday evenings are usually spent at the doors of the good ol Spur restaurant, hostessing.
I really don't have a problem with this,considering my shifts span from roughly 5:00-9:00pm and i get to indulge in their savoury veg and fresh bar, complementing the meal off with a good cup of coffee. So if i ever intend going out afterwards, which is more than likely, time is not a problem. and my social life is not affected by the hours i have to work.

Saterday hit me faster than what i knew. I managed to roll out of bed and hit the Pavillion AGAIN for like the third or fourth weekend in a row. My mother and i decided to hit the shops again. We arrived there at like 9:00am and only left at like 2:00pm. It was however to the best of my advantage, as i managed to walk away with a new top, skirt, earings, underwear and makeup. We managed to fit in a quick lunch at Centre coart, consisting of tortilla wraps, filled with creamy spinach and mushrooms, accompanied by a salad and of coarse... cuppacino:)

By the time we arrived home, it was time to get ready for the rugby at ABSA stadium- Sharks vs. Highlanders. After noticing the rain on the way back, i came to the conclusion the hairstraightner was not even an option. All ready to go, we pump up the music and vibe ourselves up for the rugby. As always, the crowd was a vibe and considering we had season tickets, we were so close to the players, we could just about smell their sweat:) We were about four rows from the field. And Francois Steyn is really not as small as he looks on t.v. He's actually huge!!
After fulfilling the cravings for Dinky Donuts, we managed to settle down an hour before the game. the game started at 8:30pm. The surrounding crowd, as i said was really awesome! It shows you what a difference the crowd makes!

After a pretty intense game with the Sharks beating the highlanders, we decided to hover on the field a bit before getting ready for 80s. The sharks players ran right passed us and we were surrounded by sharks players- (faint)- kidding:)

Anyway.. we hit 80's and the evening was really eventfull. Time waved us goodbye as we only ended up arriving back home at roughly 3:30am. There was this one guy that was determined to get me to dance at the top, above the dancefloor. A lot of the more 'confident' sort of girls enjoy dancing up there.Sometimes you could get a nice crowd of friends up there and it'l be loads of fun but this crowd was a little less appealing, with two girls rubbing themsleves up against each other, obviously one presenting with just a bikini top and the other one balancing so far on the beam, that a little more was revealed than her little denim mini. So i was pretty persistant with this guy that the floor was the better option for me. Look at first i was like 'boo ha ha, no thanks' when he asked me to join him, then he kept on asking the whole night!
What made it a little less appealing was that he was really sweaty and he was persistant on wrapping both his arms around me until i was drippig and drenched in his sweat from head to toe. Sorry if it sounds like stuck up and all but i was like...um.... k... i'm just gonna go to the bathroom now.... I didn't wanna be mean.

I really can't tell you the whole evening of 80's as that would leave me here forever and i've had min sleep! So moving on, i crashed on my bed. Was woken up sparrow's fart again this morning to exchange a couple of clothes for my mother at Sanlam. I had to go early as we intended meeting my family for lunch, for my aaunts birthday. So there i was, weary-eyed and bushy-tailed. I could bearly function. Rolling into the car, my dad and i headed off to Sanlam, arriving back at 11:00 and got ready for the lunch at Lestrada (hillcrest). After writing all this, i realise we eat out a lot! Anyway lunch was good, service was a little below average and price was a little above quality. We sat there like the whole afternoon, only arriving back home at 4:00.

That's it. That was my weekend. Tomorrow if i get the time, i'm gonna elaborate a little further. Why? Well, a lot went thorugh my head this weekend and a lot of decisions were kind of made. It was a good weekend, but also a little bit of a bummer. Will try let you in on a little tomorrow k? At the moment, i don't think im gonna get up very easily for varsity tomo! It's also gonna be a long day....

Thanks guys for your patience!
Have a great day tomo!
Mwah*